In light of the New Year, I have decided to incorporate pencils into my writing repertoire. This probably seems like a random thought but let me tell you why my new found use of pencils is actually a huge deal for me. I used to use those number 2 pencils that you could push up and replace if a piece breaks off. Remember these?

Well somewhere along the line I stopped using these pencils and only used pens. They just looked cleaner and more grown up. Anytime I asked to borrow a writing utensil and someone would offer me a pencil, I would reluctantly accept but I honestly hated writing with it.

However, 2013 needs to be the year that I introduce pencils back into my life. When you write with a pencil, you can erase it. You can edit it. You can make changes. You can get rid of it. You aren’t stuck with those same words like you would be if you had written them down with a pen.

A pencil allows you to be more flexible.

I have mentioned my new Lilly Pulitzer planner that I started using the night my grandfather fell. When I spoke to my friend about it, the very thought of using a pencil in the notebook was laughable because it just didn’t look as good. But as I really thought about it there was no better way for me to work on being flexible than to write my plans down in pencil. That way, if something comes up and plans change, it isn’t a big deal.

Being diagnosed with ulcerative colitis at the age of 13 and having to endure all that I have has forced me to try and control the things in my life that I could because there was just so much spiraling out of control for me. Being organized is just one of the ways that I tried to seek order in my world of complete and utter chaos.

I don’t want to be so regimented and feel the need to be on a schedule all of the time. I would love to have more of a “go with the flow” mentality and in many ways, I actually do. But in some ways I definitely do not and that is something I am trying to work on in this New Year.